In the long running Australian soap Neighbours there was a story arc where Billy Kennedy (son of Dr Carl and Susan) read girlfriend Anne Wilkinson’s journal. If memory serves, Billy felt Anne had feelings for someone else, and stupidly thought reading her diary would be a great way to find out what was happening. Naturally Anne found out and a very stressful situation ensued. *
10-year-old me was very stressed by this.
I have journaled intermittently throughout my life. My earliest memories of this are using a tomato themed notebook from Morning Glory (a Japanese stationery store that no longer exists except in the form of this very bare online store). Post this I had a metallic Cinderella diary with a lock that I later found, assuming it would be filled with profound thoughts, I read one entry that was about me wanting a chocolate mud cake from Safeway and as it was so late (I think it was 9pm…), I had no means of making this happen. I promptly threw the journal away and as many notebooks as I may have filled, I never keep them and absolutely never reread them. Whilst my hankering for the mud cake was valid (they’re an actual icon of the Australian cultural scene), I do not need to be reminded of my stream of conscious ramblings that make no sense at a later date, and are probably quite damaging to one’s sense of self. Since then, I have written in notebooks that have been gifted, that I’ve purchased on trips and others that I’ve absolutely had to have, regardless of how many I may have unused at home.
Simply looking up the word ‘journal’ returns countless results majority of which are attached to type of journaling such as ‘bullet’ a strategy developed by Ryder Carroll over a decade ago. The method is referred to as ‘bujo’ by those who are committed. There are journal prompts for manifestation, for working through things and for gratitude to name a few. At breakfast over the weekend a friend introduced me to the concept of junk journaling which sounds fun but also a rebrand of scrapbooking. Like most things online, it seems it was started as a free form way of visual expression with no rules, but now has a certain aesthetic.
At times I find journaling quite bothersome and often feel as if I am narrating my own thoughts. And hearing them once is enough. But as we all know, it’s the new year and establishing journaling as a habit seems to be on a lot of people’s minds – and in ads on my Instagram feed. However, I do enjoy the process of journaling overall. I’ve tried ‘morning pages’** writing down my gratitude along with diary entries which just sound like I’m talking to myself. To maintain a daily writing habit that didn’t make me totally hate myself, I ordered a journal with prompts. Some of which feel too confronting for a little scribble before bed every night but here we are. I also understand I could just find prompts online but then that would require another level of effort. ***
Then whilst reading Phoebe Lovatt’s Public Library I came across this set of prompts shared by Phoebe which I promptly printed out, because as Phoebe says, ‘the turn of a new calendar year is a good point to evaluate what’s working vs. what isn’t’.
The desire to journal feels very closely linked to our desire to be ‘book people’ in some form or another. The rise in book centred content and identifying as someone who reads, feels closely related to people who write, and both these things can suggest participation in a certain space, a way of being ‘literary’. That’s not to say that all people who read are trying to be this way, but rather there is a performative element as well as identity formation that can happen when we participate in these things. Not simply in the work that’s done through the act of writing but the act of acquiring the stationery (often far overpriced) and implementing this habit and then aesthetically showing both these things. Again, we are mimicking the influencer mainstay of commodifying and beautifying our lives in ways that don’t necessarily need to be.
Even though we may share what the outside of these things look like - the idea to have a space solely of your own feels like a welcome change to the overshare. Influencers who share journal and planner (I mean the wormhole we could go down…) content will often blur out what is actually on the pages, choosing to share the format or the fact they have undertaken the act in the first place. ****
Many books written in first person can take the form of diary entries, something I don’t automatically love but it depends. The Diary of a Nobody is a satirical novel published in 1892 and it only occurred to me last night that I’m reading this book whilst writing this piece so I’m sure that has influenced things. The book is best summarised by Simon & Schuster ‘Weedon Grossmith's 1892 book presents the details of English suburban life through the anxious and accident-prone character of Charles Pooter.’ The book is super banal in a lot of ways, yet the short entries and indignant attitude to these ordinary situations are bizarre and funny. It’s comforting.
*A quick google confirms that this was episode 3361 in 1999. Billy was caught by Hannah (no recollection of her) and Anne’s feelings were for a man named Fanto which feels extremely exotic for Ramsay Street, even by today’s standards.
**A routine of writing out three full pages every morning as popularised by Julie Cameron’s The Artist’s Way.
*** I once created some prompts for this very newsletter with the aim of helping people understand their relationship with the media better. It was a very short-lived idea.
**** This also acts as a reminder to the audience of the barrier many of us would like us to believe doesn’t exist.